In taoism, there is a breathing practice to activate and guide the sexual energies. There are several exercises, but the gist of if is to breathe in tightening the pelvic floor muscles, in order to make the sexual energy ‘rise’. The next step is to try to ‘feel’ it in the heart and transform it into love and compassion, and then breathe out. I like it that, for them, abstinence is not about ignoring and rejecting the sexual energy as something evil, but rather about using it to transform and grow. They really try to teach about how to deal with it, instead of just rejecting it, or burning it away. I don’t know if it really works, but it seems harmless enough and it’s worth a try. Certainly safer than going boy crazy and trying to find strangers to have sex with.
I’ve gotten to the ‘activation’ part, but then I get too restless and simply masturbate to get rid of it. Never gotten to the ‘transforming’ part. It really activates with that type of breathing, and then I feel like it’s a fire that’s out of control and is going to burn me if I don’t do something about it. I’ve only tried it in earnest once or twice. Maybe I’ll give it another try and see what happens.
Dealing with sexual energy is about acknowledging that I am a sexual individual, that sexuality is beautiful and it is not something bad and twisted (more remnants of my too catholic upbringing). In my upbringing, anything sexual outside of sex with the purpose of making babies during marriage, is seen as a ‘sin’. Something to be cleansed, purified and simply erased, you must ‘repent’ feel ‘guilty and ashamed’ and confess to a batty old priest and ask him for forgiveness. I see how this is wrong, but I’ve been brainwashed into thinking that it is true. I’m not even talking about actual having sex, I’m talking about feeling aroused.
So, here is to embracing my sexuality and my desire. Yes, I feel aroused, I think about sex and I am a sexual creature. It’s beautiful, it’s powerful…now let’s try and learn how to use all that power….